Two Rottweilers and a Porcupine
As a veterinarian, I’m often asked, do any dogs scare you? Like Rottweilers?
Or Pit Bulls? And the answer is forever “no way!” I’ve had two questionable moments with Rottweilers.
I should not have been at work the first time. I had 103F fever, and the Rottie’s parents dropped his leash as he dove across the exam room to greet me. Judging by the pallid look on my face, the dad assured me,”Oh, he would never hurt you.”
I barely managed a feeble,”That’s not what I’m worried about,” when he launched his paws around my neck and licked my face from chin to forehead. I felt so weak I stumbled against a counter that was thankfully right behind me!
“Oh, sorry. We didn’t realize how strong he could be.”
The second time I had a close encounter of the Rottweiler kind, I was examining a lovely, dusty, axle-grease covered coupla junk-yard Rotts. The male was twice as big as his lady friend, and I sat on the floor between them to perform the examination.
Again,”He’d never hurt a fly, Doc. But don’t tell the car thieves that he’s a pussy-cat.”
No sooner did I rest the stethoscope on his lady friend than my peripheral vision became disturbingly blocked. He licked the right side of my face so fast, I didn’t have time to blink!
Ever have your cornea licked by a small, domestic buffalo? Ow!
That brings me to the two Rottweiler brothers who lived in the woods in Maine. Let’s call them Tweedle-Dee and Tweedle-Dum. This dynamic duo met Mr. Porcupine in the back yard.
Brother One attacked the porcupine and got 30 quills to the face, while Brother Two watched and then decided he needed some pain, too! Bam! 40 quills in 40 seconds!
I sedated the brothers, one after the other, and painstakingly removed 70 quills from their muzzles.
Einstein would have absolutely loved these 2 statistical anomalies, (if not only for the mathematical curiosity) but also the shear anecdotal quality.
So, guess who was back at my office a mere 4 hours later? Not one, but both Rottweiler brothers with faces full of quills again, twice in the same day!!
All for one and one for all! Viva la Porcupine!